Sometimes

11:17:00 AM Gadislensa 1 Comments




Assalamualaikum everyone! 

Alhamdulillah , praised be to Allah S.W.T . Everyday is another chance to change our life.


Sometimes you have to live through the worst parts of life so you never take the best parts for granted.
Sometimes it hurts more to stay away from what hurts you than to keep allowing it to hurt you.
That's why you make excuses when they don't exist. That's why you create hope that, ironically, make you hopeless. That's why you put locks on doors before you try to open them. Not everyone we meet will give us the respect or love that we deserve. Respect them anyway. Love them anyway. No matter what we do, be kind. It is better to be kind and be hurt than to be unkind and cause pain.

Just because someone caused you pain, it does not mean that others aren't trustworthy.
Just because someone broke your heart, it does not mean that it will remain broke forever.

It is better to love with a whole heart, to give with a whole heart, and to trust with a whole heart than to never experience the beauty of love, the reward of giving, and the comfort of trusting.
This is all parts of the experience that grow us, not fear of it.

There will come a time when you will want to run away, to hide, to stop existing for a while.
My dear, it is on those days that you should raise up your hands up to the sky and call out to Allah and cry. Never did Allah say that this journey would be easy, but, countless times he has promised that he will be our "wali" (protective friend) through every moment of it. And yet we leave his company and run after the people and things that break us.

Sometimes I find it unfair, other people continue to judge me and badmouthing me for what they hear only from the other side. I've been accused of nothing for what i didn't do and misinterpreted. Every person on earth has problems of his or her own. You may look around and see that everyone else's life is perfect because they have what they want or what you wish you had. You may be feeling like you're living in a blurry view. You may not care about how you interact with those around you because you're so engulfed in your own troubles. Who knows that their troubles may be bigger than yours, worse than yours and more hurtful than yours. Just because I don't talk about them, doesn't mean they don't exist. Every thought has the right time to be verbalized, and every feeling has the right time to be expressed. The reason I write this not to gain your sympathy.  I am not saying I am perfect because we're all bad in someone's story.

You see, we all walk different paths. We struggle to be ourselves in a world that want us to be anything but ourselves. We know our own weaknesses and struggles, and you are the one who need to works to overcome them, so your strength means more to you than it could ever mean to anyone else. If you're not living my life, don't think you know how I should live it. It is easy to judge a person's decisions if we don't try to understand the reasons that led to those decisions. Gravitate toward those who assume the best in you, even at your worst.

I pray that all of us would be given the supernatural wisdom to find ways in overcoming the challenges you are facing today. And may you be blessed with the strength and commitment to carry through. Amiin.

see you again peeps!
xoxo


Love;
-fs-

1 comments:

Being STRONG is the only choice

9:52:00 PM Gadislensa 0 Comments







Peace be upon to you, It’s been awhile since my last post about loving yourself.
Alhamdulillah,for everything. Every little things matter the most. I finished my diploma, in Jun 2019. Apparently I survived although I said I can’t endure this pain. Surprisingly I became stronger than before just because of this one person. Thank you for entering my life. I learned a lot for 3 years in Gombak. Malay people use to say this “asam garam kehidupan” gituuu. Im pretty sure everyone know that;

No one is sent by accident to anyone. They’re meant to cross our path for a reason. Either they’re a blessing or a lesson. The ones who build you up or the ones who tear you down. But in the end, you’ll thank them both for who you are now.

Diploma’s life just ended. I just finished my one step to a real world, I have many more steps to go, to endure and to struggle with. People come and go. I learned a lot that no one will stay in your life no matter how good you treat them. But that does not mean you should stop being kind to people. Do not change the kindness in you just because of one person that treat you badly.

 I trust this word “if he/she’s meant to be in your life he/she will be.”

I have a story to share, I know this is all part of Allah’s plan. Never in my life’s  plan to get separate with my favorite person. (let say I give her initial name Q) Allah took Q out from my life 8 months ago and today Allah returns Q back to me. We never contact each other. See? Who could even imagine this things will happen. I never had a thought that I will talk again to Q.I am so blessed and I know this is all part of Allah’s plan. In the end Allah will save the relationships with those who deserve to be in your life. Allah won’t give to you on what you WANT but Allah S.W.T will give on what you NEED. Allah will brings certain people in your life to teach you, inspire you, help you grow, make you laugh and make you strong.

If you know the things I went through, the experiences that left scars underneath my skin, you will realize how ugly I have been. Wonderful will be the last thing that comes to your mind whenever you lay your eyes upon me. But, I still loved myself and even getting proud of myself.

I received quite a lot of Dm's on “how to be strong like you”. I am not that strong actually but being strong is the only choice I have. If I didn’t do it then who else will?  Let’s zoom in a little bit deeper, if I choose to give up, what will happen to me now? I am not sure I will be here to write this post. Whenever you feel like giving up with your life, remind yourself of how far you have come from a place you never thought you’d get out of. Even you might not be where you want to be yet, still acknowledge and be proud of the growth you’ve achieved so far. You made it this far, do not give up now. Just remember that better days are coming. Yesterday might be crazy, today might be worse, but better days are coming. Have faith in Allah always. Trust me that Allah’s timing is perfect in every matter. We don’t always understand the wisdom behind it, but we have to learn to trust it.

I still remember when I was so down with my life, where my parents went to perform hajj, and Allah sent me lots of tests, too many people who I loved the most left me alone. And I felt lost for that moment. I am the eldest and I don’t have sister or brother to share with. In that time I hold a lot of commitment, where I need to check up on my mom’s kindergarten, I need to check on my little brother in Tahfiz.

Im super glad that I have a maid who I can trust with taking care of the house and my little brother. Not to forget, my sahabat! I am so grateful that I have super supportive roommates who always cheer me up whenever I feel down, giving me hug when I need. Allah won’t simply take out someone in your life without replacing a better one.

Here’s a little bit reminder for all who are currently struggling with yourself. It’s okay for not knowing the answers yet. It’s okay to be a little bit lost, scared, and forget how it is to figure things out. It’s okay to stop for a moment and forgive yourself for being a work of art in progress. It’s okay to bleed and have scars here and there. It’s okay to fail and get back once again when you’re ready. It’s okay to go one step at a time, to take things slow. And to be gentle to yourself. Because every good things take time. Remember that! 

I know it’s hard to stay strong and optimist all the time, there are time when you crumble and collapse but that’s alright. You can always learn to stand up back. Sometimes Allah will ask you to release the thing you want the most. That’s a test. If you past the test, at some point, He’ll either give back what you want or He’ll bring something better in your life.
To anyone who are currently struggle with their emotion and surrounding just to let you know that you’re mattered, you’re loved and you’re needed.

Today,
Kiss your scars,
Apologies your heart.

Today,
Fall in love with yourself.

Strength is not always in what we say and do, sometimes it is in what we are silent about, in what we leave or ignore. Life is a learning process. If you think you want to change do not hesitate but do it now. Don’t procrastinate. The clock ticks. And it will always be. If Allah said it is for you, it will be yours. If Allah said it is not for you, you try so hard it is not going to be yours. Kun Faya Kun. (Tuhan kata jadi, Maka jadilah). Just deep the fact that Allah S.W.T has protected us from so many things we didn’t even know about and He has blessed us with so many things we didn’t even pray for and yet we still complain. Be grateful.
P/s : Thank you to all my close friends who checking up on me. I remembered this one time they said “It’s so hurtful seeing you like this.” Now, I found my strength and myself back again and I’m really grateful.

I end my writing with this quote;

 “If you don’t heal what hurt you, you’ll bleed on people who didn’t cut you.”

Sincerely:
Fs.





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